Searching
by SmokeyTV
Summary: Nick finds that searching for answers is sometimes as difficult as searching for a suspect. Or a victim. Spoilers for "Gum Drops".


**This was written for the Nick Fic Song Challenge at Talk CSI. The inspiration was the song, "You Found Me", by The Fray, and the word limit was 2,500. Spoilers for "Gum Drops". Enjoy!**

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Searching

Sage. Seriously? Had her parents _really_ named her that? Probably not. But then again, if they _were_ the type of parents who would name a child Sage, then they must have raised her in a way befitting her name.

Sage.

Wise. Clever. Astute.

"I heard about Nina, Jude, and Jeremy," she said. "So sad. Such a sweet family. It didn't look good, I know, but you still hope."

"Yeah," said Nick. "Yeah, you do."

"And there's still no sign of Cassie?"

"No, not yet," he answered.

She shook her head sadly. "Poor little thing." Then she asked him, "Did you have some more questions for me? I don't really know anything other than what I've told you."

"Sort of," said Nick. "Can we sit down?"

She said, "Of course," and they went up the stone steps to her front porch. It was graced with comfortable looking natural wicker furniture. She already had a pitcher of iced tea sitting on the small table, and she offered him a glass which he accepted with thanks.

"It's nice out this way," he said as he took a seat, gazing out at the dirt lane and the tall evergreens that blocked the view of the road.

"It suits me," she said with a smile. They sat for a few moments in silence before she said, "You want to know how I know." It was not a question.

Nick wasn't surprised at her statement…that she knew why he'd come to see her. His encounter with her the day before had left him bewildered but also with a sense of peace and calmness. He could not leave it at that though. The investigator in him came out, and curiosity led him to seek her out again. "Yeah," he said, still gazing out at the trees. "I mean…actually…I don't really know what it is that you know, but…what you said…" He turned to look at her. "It was the right thing at the right time."

Sage laughed, a light and lilting sound that was the perfect complement to her personality. "I get that a lot," she said. "Well, sometimes it freaks people out, but I can usually tell ahead of time how they might react. I won't say anything if it's going to do them more harm than good."

"You think you did me some good then?"

She smiled at him. "You're here, aren't you?"

He smiled back. "Yeah, I guess I am." He took a sip of his tea and set the glass down before getting serious again. "So…what do you know? What made you say that?"

Sage shrugged a little. "It's hard to explain, Nick. I mean, it's not like I'm psychic or anything. I just get these feelings, you know? I got a good feeling from you. Still do." She smiled, and Nick thought he saw a slight blush cross her cheeks.

"You said I was doing good….getting through this life."

She grew more serious then and moved her chair so that she was facing him. "I feel the energy around people…coming from inside them. Yours is strong, Nick…positive. But…" She was looking into his eyes now, studying them. "There's something underneath it…something negative. Something happened."

"Just one thing?" Nick laughed.

She shook her head. "No. More than one. But most of them are weak…things you've already settled and come to terms with."

Nick stopped smiling, but nodded.

"What haven't you settled, Nick? I sense you struggling."

Now _that_ was irony. He started to speak, but his mouth had become dry. He glanced at the glass of tea, condensation from the warm afternoon running down the side of it. He opted not to chance it, fearing his shaking hands would make a mess of it. He cleared his throat then, wiping the palms of his hands on his jeans. "Six months ago…" He shook his head. He didn't like saying it out loud, but she was waiting to hear, and it was why he had come. "I was kidnapped. And…uh…I was…" He couldn't voice the details. "It's just…they almost didn't find me in time." He looked up at her. "I almost died."

She nodded, smiling. "You didn't. And I told you…you're doing good. So why did you come to see me?"

Out with it then. "You talk to God?"

His hopeful, expectant face made her sorry that she had to slowly shake her head and say, "No."

He offered up a brief smile and then looked down. "Yeah…yeah…I figured. There isn't one, is there?"

"Oh, I believe there's a God, Nick," she quickly corrected him. "I mean, I don't _talk_ to him, but I believe the feelings I get about people are a gift from him. I'm spiritual…I'm just not religious about it." She laughed a little at that.

"So he gave you a gift? I guess…I just thought…" He stopped speaking as he sighed and ran a hand over his face.

He looked so tired, she thought. She knew he'd been up most of the day and night on this case, trying to do _some_ good with it before it was too late. She reached over and took his hand. "Thought what?"

He did not look up as he spoke. "Thought…maybe you could ask him for me. Ask him why. Ask him where he's been."

"You can ask him, Nick."

He laughed, shaking his head. "Been there, done that. But the only answer I get is that it keeps happening. Bad things keep happening to me. And I still don't know why."

They sat quietly for a moment, the only sounds that of birds chirping in the trees and a slight breeze blowing. Nick let go of her hand and stood up. "Well…I need to get going. Thanks…for the tea…and everything."

She looked up at him. "Are you sure you have to go now?"

"Yeah…yeah…I uh..." He looked away, gazing down the dirt lane. "I need to find her."

Sage smiled. "There's the answer you asked for, Nick."

"Huh?" He looked down at her, confused.

"That's why these things happened to you."

He slowly sat back down, facing her. "What do you mean?"

"You're the only one still looking for Cassie, you know? They're going along with it, but they don't believe she's alive. You do though, don't you?"

He nodded silently, waiting to hear more.

Sage continued. "You believe it because it happened to you. That's why you know it's possible, and _that's_ why you're not giving up like everyone else."

Flashes were exploding in Nick's head. The light. The dark. The panic. Warrick's face above him…his hand reaching for Nick's, holding it tightly. _I got you, man. I got you._ They found him.

"That's why God put you through it. That's why you survived it. So you could save her. So you _would_ save her. You're the only one who still has reason to believe she's alive."

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A boat on the dark water. Lights piercing the night. Searching. "Please…God…" he uttered, and there she was. He jumped out and made his way to her, and took her small hand in his. "I got you…I got you."

At the hospital, he gave her the truth she asked for, his heart breaking for her. He wondered, why did she live when her family was gone? What's the purpose in that?

She took his large hand in hers. "You found me," she said.

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**Hope you liked it! Drop a review and let me know what you think! :-)**


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